Many of you have reached out to me via DM over the last few weeks and asked “why” I am writing and posting more this year. I really appreciate the questions.
The “why” is quite simple. At the end of each year, I purposefully take some quiet time write out what things in my life I want to personally improve over the coming year. One of my major goals this year is to improve my writing effectiveness, my writing efficiency, and to support that goal, write daily. Writing daily and hitting “send” allows this to become a habit for me and I am honored so many of you took time to let me know your thoughts.
Simon Sinek is an outstanding author and one book that had a profound impression on me is his “Start with Why.” I first realized the value of this great book when serving as the COO of a tech startup whose primary employee base was younger professionals. While it may take an extra minute or two, starting with why, and gaining alignment and support, while explaining the reason for doing something goes a long way with people understanding where you are coming from.
So, thank you for all your messages and kind words and to Simon Sinek, thank you for your inspiration to me and to the incredible support to the Military and the Fighter Pilot community in particular. You are a great American doing important things to improve leadership across the country with your writing.
The Author is currently serving as an active duty military officer. Any comments or recommendations on this post or on this site are solely my personal views and do not represent the position of any branch of the United States Government.
Success in life is so
much about essential choices, timing, and good fortune – especially when it
comes to the people we surround ourselves with.
I have been so blessed through
these choices, some great timing, and good fortune in my life to have
incredible wingmen, friends, and family. They have made my life so much richer. I remain so grateful for each of them and I
have trusted many of them with my life multiple times.
I have also made
incorrect choices, had to adjust to bad timing and embrace misfortune. Simply recovering from misjudged situations,
motivations, or the intentions of others has contributed equally to my personal
growth.
Every time I’ve had a
less than optimum experience with a person or a relationship, I’ve learned
something from the experience. I didn’t
ask the right questions, didn’t ask enough questions, didn’t check references,
trust my gut, or I let emotions get in the way. In retrospect, the clues were there and while
these are frequently deep and painful lessons, I am wiser now and they happen
with significantly less frequency.
I now think clearly and
deliberately about the “wingmen” in my life. These are without a doubt some of the most
important decisions you will ever make. Time is your most precious gift in life and
choosing wisely with whom you will spend that time will make all the difference
in your life. It absolutely has for me.
Most importantly, do not ever forget that “wingmanship” is a two-way street. Deliver on your end every time – and if you don’t, own it and fix it.
The Author is currently serving as
an active duty military officer. Any comments or recommendations on this post
or on this site are solely my personal views and do not represent the position
of any branch of the United States Government.
I spend a lot of time with the teams I get to be a part of talking about the various ways to both approach, and solve, complex and wicked problems. Remaining focused on the issue at hand versus the emotions that can surround an issue is a lot of our focus.
As a teenager I remember first reading a book about Apollo 13. Apollo 13, Commanded by legendary Astronaut Jim Lovell, was the supposed to be the second moon landing. Not long after beginning the long journey to the Moon, Apollo 13 had a major in-flight emergency which immediately put the crews lives at risk. At that time, this was the most significant challenge NASA had ever faced during a flight.
Mission Control in Houston was instantly thrown into a confusing and chaotic situation which required immediate, and precise decisions, in order to save the crew. In what became a seminal learning point for me, legendary Flight Director Gene Kranz, while leading his team through the chaos of the initial reactions, paused, thought, and told his team… “work the problem people… work the problem.” And they did… and over the next few days managed to make thousands of correct decisions which resulted in Apollo 13 safely looping around the back side of the Moon and returning safely to Earth with all three crew members aboard.
I’ve adapted the concept that Flight Director Kranz took, as well as many other famous leaders in our history, and boiled it down to two simple words.. “Stay Frosty”.
I hope this approach helps you as much as it has helped me and others in our business.
Also check out Mr. Kranz’s book “Failure is not an option”. It is a great read.
The Author is currently serving as an active duty military officer. Any comments or recommendations on this post or on this site are solely my personal views and do not represent the position of any branch of the United States Government.
Earlier in my career I had the opportunity to attend the USAF Fighter Weapons School. If you envision TOPGUN… but without the volleyball, the bar scenes, the motorcycles, and you make it longer… you’d get the idea.
The air combat phase is one of the toughest. It starts with 1v1 air combat and ultimately progress to 4 or 8 good guys (Blue) versus a lot of adversary aircraft (Red). One of our rides ended up with 8 Blue versus 24+ Red. The enemy can regenerate after flying back over their territory and coming back alive to give the blue side a very complex and dynamic problem testing both our tactics, weapons employment plans and discipline.. and our perhaps most importantly our communications skills.
As you can imagine the radios are very busy during a complex dynamic fight. Pilots and weapons controllers must listen closely, process what they are hearing, and understand it… all while flying the jet, running the sensors, making decisions on whether to shoot or not… at night on night vision googles. Everyone must make deliberate and thoughtful decisions to be clear, concise, and correct when we do key the microphone and say something on the radio. There is no room for error here… None. Oh by the way… be calm when you do key the microphone.
As complex as everything sounds in the scenario above, one could make the case that with the advent of advanced technologies and communications systems, today’s leaders are challenged with much of the same things we are. Everyone, especially todays leaders must be able to communicate effectively, and efficiently in the fast-moving worlds of life and business.
Great communicators take the time to listen, process, and understand what it is they are hearing. They are intent on putting things aside when their team comes to them… and listening (and most importantly hearing) what is being said… processing the information by being present in the conversation and seeking to understand the perspectives of the team member who is communicating with them. They are also thoughtful and deliberate in what method they communicate with their team and what and how they say it.
I think about communications a lot. I can always be a better communicator.
As a technique I’d spend some time thinking about your approach to communication. Do you listen (hear), process, and understand what is being shared or said to you? Do you take the time to be thoughtful and deliberate in being clear, concise, and correct in your communication with those important stakeholders in your life? Are you present?
BTW, to my Navy and TOPGUN buddies… you know I love you.
The Author is currently serving as an active duty military officer. Any comments or recommendations on this post or on this site are solely my personal views and do not represent the position of any branch of the United States Government.
Earlier in my life, I was all over the place in terms of deliberately developing what a successful and sustainable daily ritual might look like.
Three years ago while serving in a very high-tempo military job I made the decision to change this. I set out to put some deep and deliberate thought and design into what works for me and what would sustain my optimal level of performance over time. I wish I’d done this in my teens. It has sustained me while in very high-pressure jobs both at home and while deployed.
So here it is:
4:15 AM: Alarm / Wakeup
4:30-5:15 AM: Bullet Proof Coffee. Read the following:
Daily devotional, Bible study,”Strength for Service”, “The Daily Stoic”, Morning reflection.
5:15-5:30 AM: Daily Journal
5:30-6:30 AM: Workout / physical training (Weights, Cardio, Yoga)
6:30-7:00 AM: Bloomberg News or a Podcast while prepping for work / Protein shake
7:00 AM: Arrive at work
7:00-6:00 PM: Work (My departure times vary)
8:30 PM: Nightly shutdown, reflection, and meditation.
~9:00 PM: Sleep (67 degrees, dark room)
I work out 6 days a week and take Sunday’s off.
I wish I’d done this years ago and hope that you will develop a Daily Ritual that works for you.
I also recommend you check out the book “Daily Rituals: How artists work” by Mason Currey. It was an entertaining read.
Any comments or recommendations on this post or on this site are solely my personal views and do not represent the position of any branch of the United States Government.
Before, and after, becoming an entrepreneur I flew F-16’s for the US Military.
One of the things we did religiously after every mission was a non-emotional, fact-based debrief.
The debrief had one purpose… to dig for the facts and then from those facts derive concrete lessons learned that we could export to the rest of the Squadron in order to be more effective as warfighters. We debriefed after every mission both in peacetime and in combat focusing on our survivability and lethality. Debriefing is part of who I am now and I do it daily in both my military and civilian life.
I”ve watched with interest the events surrounding WeWork over the last year. Recently the WSJ published an article on the financing side of WeWork. The link to the WSJ article is here. I’m by no means rendering an opinion given that I was not in the board meetings, but one wonders what kind of debrief the team there is conducting and what lessons they will all learn from this experience.
I’m currently serving on an active duty tour with the US Military. This blog represents my personal views and does not represent the views of any element of the US Governmentor my views as a US Government employee.
I spend a lot of time every day reading and consuming information.
For years I have followed Fred Wilson’s “AVC” blog. Fred has been a VC since 1987 and is a Managing Partner at Union Square Ventures in NYC. I’ve learned a lot from Fred over the years and sincerely enjoy his writing.
I loved his blog today on “Butter” and the associated piece from his colleague Nick Grossman known as “The Butter Thesis” and wanted to pass it on. I highly recommend that you both read this blog and subscribe to both Fred’s blog and Nicks.
I’m currently on active duty as a US Military Officer.This blog represents my personal views and does not represent the views of any element of the US Governmentor my views as a US Government employee.
I have been so fortunate in my life to have met and worked with so many amazing people.. but when I think about true lifelong friends the list is a bit shorter.
At the top of that list is Charles “Skammer” Skoda.
Skammer, Steve McShea, and I started our first company together. Skammer was brilliant and had an incredible impact on everyone around him – most of all his Family and friends.
Today is Skammer’s birthday.
We lost him this past year with another great friend Steve DeWolf. This picture was taken shortly before they passed away.
What I always will remember about Skammer is that no matter what was going on his life… whatever troubles he might be having… he always… always… was checking on other people.
Skammer you were a giant of a man… a loving Husband, Father, Brother, and Team mate. We miss you like crazy and honor you today.
121st Fighter Squadron F-16C+s on the ramp at Andrews AFB, MD on the night of 9/11. Photo Credit: 113th Wing Member
It is hard to believe that it has been 17 years.
This morning I woke up in Iraq. I had a few minutes standing on a flight line with a group of US Army and US Navy Special Operations warriors. Most were in their late 20’s. Only two were in the service when our Nation was attacked in 2001. All made the selfless decision to join our military knowing full well they were likely to go to war.
While we were standing on the ramp September 11th came up. I asked them where they were from, what their story was, and where they were that morning. Some were at work on their first assignments. Most were in school.
Then one of the Navy guys asked me where I was. I told them I was in DC. I don’t normally talk about 9/11 but I felt like there was some goodness in sharing with these guys.
I told them about the weather in Washington that morning – the clear beautiful blue perfect skies and the perfect temperature.
I told them about when, and how we found out the Nation was under attack – when our meeting was interrupted with the news. How we moved to the room with the TV, and on seeing the first tower burning from the helicopter news camera… the size of the hole in the building… and then watching the second airplane enter the picture and fly right into the second tower.
I told them about the silence that seemed to last forever after the second airplane impacted… when in reality it was a few seconds…
I told them about a switch being thrown in the squadron as we started to react.
I told them about the Crew Chiefs, the Weapons Loaders, and the Support Crews responding… all the while in the distance they could clearly see the acrid thick black smoke from the Pentagon.
I told them about Brig Gen Dave Wherley, our Commander, and his unbelievably perfect leadership that morning… “I trust you, you will do what is right, and no matter what… I have your back.”.
I told them about Ben Sliney and his first day at work at the FAA supervising the entire U.S. airspace system and his making the decision to shut down the US airspace – no doubt saving lives.
I told them about NYFD Chief Pfeifer, the Fire Fighting Commander at the World Trade Center who’s Brother was also a Firefighter… and the Chief sending his Brother and his team up into the Tower never to return.
I told them about the Passengers on Flight 93, Todd Beamer, Tom Burnett and the rest of the passengers and the absolutely pure and perfect example of human sacrifice they made in the toughest of times… and for giving my Squadron the gift of not having to make the toughest decision of our lives.
I told them about the aerial refueling tanker crews that just magically showed up over DC and kept us airborne… and did in Afghanistan and Iraq, and still do today.
In the end, I guess I told them about the American spirit, our American will, and what it really means to be selfless. In the soulful sadness of that day, there are so many incredible lessons that we all should learn from.
17 years is an incredibly long time to be at war… and we are still going at it.
Literally, as I write, America and our Allies and partners are still fighting the Taliban, Al Qaeda, and ISIS.
Is it worth it? My answer… you bet your ass it is… so that our Children and our Children’s Children will hopefully never have to live through what our generation has.
May we never ever forget 9/11/2001 and the many examples of the American Spirit from that morning, and all the mornings thereafter in this longest of wars. I know I won’t.
They were waiting for him when he arrived. They had never met him before but despite their difference in service, he was unquestionably their Brother.
They were six US Navy SEAL Officers. One, an O-6 US Navy Captain, the Commander. A second, the operations officer, a Lieutenant Commander and the other four were brand new BUDS graduates… all on their first deployment. All 1st LTs or JGs.
As he arrived, they met him at the ramp to the emergency room door. They moved silently, three to a side, and they, not the medical team, carried him into the ER where they surrounded him as the Chaplain read him his last rights.
When the Chaplin was done the Operations Officer ordered a hand salute… then for the next sixteen hours in 120-degree heat the young, brand new BUDS graduates, on their first deployment, stood the watch over him until the C-130 came to bring him home to his Family for the final time… their lives changed forever.
There are no words to express how the Brotherhood of War really works. As a Nation, we could not be more lucky to have American’s who selfless leave their families to go to war to protect us all… and give it all… and the Brotherhood and Sisterhood that serves alongside them every step of the way.
God Bless you and your Family… and thank you all beyond words.
